Please McDonald’s, leave my shake alone

Years ago, I slept over my friend Martha and Laura’s college apartment. Laura had to get up to go to work. I was in the same bed as Martha. I woke up fresh from a dream about a chocolate (not milk) shake from McDonald’s. I stopped at the nearest Golden Arches near their Penn State Hazelton place and fulfilled my dream-induced craving. That was 1997 or 1998.

I haven’t craved a shake like that in years, but yesterday I had to run an errand to AAA in Wilkes-Barre. There’s a McDonald’s across the street, which I passed to turn into the lot. I thought that since it was over 90-degrees outside and that I was stuck to my seat from sweat since I do not have air conditioning in my car that a nice chocolate shake would taste nice. So, all through the paperwork I had to do, I thought of nothing but the shake.

I momentarily stopped thinking about the shake when I had to date a contract and asked what date it was, and found out it was already August ninth. Then, as I wrote out the numeric date, I laughed out loud, “Ha! 8, 9, 10!” She chuckled, but wasn’t sure if it was with me or at me. But, after that interesting finding, my thoughts wandered back to the shake.

The line was long. And, I was already in it and it was so backed up and with the parking lot designed like an upper level of Dr. Mario, there was no escape. So, I just waited. All I wanted was a shake, but after this pain, I figured I deserved a double cheeseburger too.

It was finally my turn. I ordered a medium chocolate shake and my burger and proceeded through two windows.

This is what I was handed.

new mcdonalds shake

This is not what I thought I would get.

Yeah. That. McDonald’s now puts its shakes in clear cups and tops them with whipped cream and a cherry. The whipped cream pretty much instantly melted in the heat, by the way. But aside from that, I was shocked at the way it was served. Why so fancy? I posted the image on my Facebook page and tweeted it before even leaving the parking lot. Others commented that McDonald’s is trying to be all artisan with its drinks.

No thank you.

If I want a good coffee – I go to Dunkin Donuts or even, yes, McDonalds. Sometimes Sheetz (local place in PA). If I want a fancier coffee drink, I go to Starbucks — the coffee is a bit strong for me, so if I go Starbucks, I go with an espresso drink.

And, when it comes to milkshakes, if I want somethings more milkshakey, I’ll go to an ice cream stand, to a Friendly’s or to somewhere known for desserts. If I want a really thick ice cream concoction that is like a shake, I will go to Wendy’s to enjoy a Frosty. This drink, pictured above, is the last thing I expected to come through the little window when I asked for a shake.

That’s right. A shake. Not even a milkshake. McDonald’s is trying too hard to be something it is not. The Quarter Pounder and the Big Mac are old standbys, and so are the shakes – vanilla, strawberry, chocolate and sometimes Shamrock. But alas, the traditional coffee and shake are now part of the McCafe line.

What do you think? Do you like the new way McDonald’s serves its shakes?

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About Donna Talarico

Higher ed web marketing. Creative writer. Love word games. View all posts by Donna Talarico

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